HAPPY NEW YEAR TO
ALL!!! Welcome to our
42nd monthly newsletter and 2009's
first!
__________________________________
"Looking Back, Looking Forward:
Are We Ready to Truly
Evolve?"
by
Terrence Daryl
Shulman ________________________________
You own two
shops, and you run back and forth. Try to
close the one that's a fearful trap getting
always smaller, checkmate, this way, checkmate
that. Keep open
the shop where you're not selling fishhooks
anymore. You are the free swimming
fish.
-Excerpt from Rumi's "Tending
Two
Shops" -------------------------------------------------- There are two kinds of
intelligence: one acquired, as a child in
school memorizes facts and concepts from books
and from what the teacher says, collecting
information from the traditional sciences as
well as from the new sciences.
With such
intelligence you rise in the world. You get
ranked ahead or behind others in regard to your
competence in retaining information. You stroll
with this intelligence in and out of fields of
knowledge, getting always more marks on your
preserving tablets.
There is another kind
of tablet, one already completed and preserved
inside you. A spring overflowing its springbox.
A freshness in the center of the chest. This
other intelligence does not turn yellow or
stagnate. It's fluid, and it doesn't move from
outside to inside through conduits of
plumbing-learning.
This second knowing is a
fountainhead from within you, moving
out.
Rumi--"Two Kinds of
Intelligence"
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Rumi, born in 1307 in what is
now an area between Iran and Afghanistan, has been
my favorite poet since I discovered him in 1993.
These two poems speak to me lately. Do you ever
feel like you're running back and forth trying to
attend to life's physical and material tasks and
obligations, driven by fear, and sensing or
knowing there's gotta be more to life than this
"shop," this "busy-ness"? Do you feel trapped
in a pattern of relying on "your own best
thinking"--that logical, reasonable, prudence
which has served you so well but
which, lately, doesn't seem to provide the
answers and solutions for the same or new
problems? It's kinda like you're missing a tool
from a toolbox and can't finish the job
without it! Ah, to be that "free swimming fish" or
possess that "fountainhead of knowledge within"
which Rumi's poems so powerfully
evoke.
On the cusp of the new year, I feel
I'm at a crossroads in my life. I have a strong
sense that many others are as well. Perhaps,
we as a nation--even a species--are at a
crossroads. Great signs of hope and despair
interweave in a powerful and fragile dance. With
the economy tanking and war and terrorism still
making headlines, we in America elected a
president who inspires so many with the promise of
change and progress. As the days of wild spending
and mounting debt face a day of reckoning, perhaps
we can return or evolve to a more balanced,
simple, and healthy lifestyle and way of thinking.
Stories of theft and fraud--from shoplifting's 84%
spike during the holidays to Bernard Madoff's
$50 billion swindle--alarm us and remind
us of the importance of honesty in our
individual and collective lives.
2008 was a
busy year in which I published a third book, put
on a conference, succeded through diet,
exercise and medications to knock my
cholesterol down, and took steps to strengthen my
marriage. All during the year I dealt with a
looming lawsuit from an organization in New York
that has been claiming an exclusive right to use
the term 'shoplifters anonymous." I completed a 10-day silent meditation
retreat in November to help balance my life. Two
weeks after my return--on December 2nd--I was
served with that lawsuit. After some initial
shock and disbelief, fear and anger (yes, life
feels unfair at times!), I have come full circle
and chosen to fight the lawsuit with full force of
mind, body, and spirit. I've reached out to
family, friends, and others to vent and get
feedback and I've hired and fired one lawyer
and hired another. I am increasingly aware of the
opportunities this "inconvenient event" may be
offering me, not the least of which is to stand up
for myself as well as to ask for "divine guidance
and support." I even had a session with a friend
and spiritual advisor who assisted me in a process
of meditation and centering to connect more
clearly and powerfully with my Higher Power. My
wife and best friends nearly fainted when they
heard this!
We may have
many challenges--legal, financial, health,
relational, vocational, emotional; personal,
national, or international. And we must
manage the realm of the material/physical (dotting
our "i's" and crossing our "t's"). But
we must also be attentive to the "metaphysical"
(through meditation, prayer, openness to miracles
wherever they come from); for, often, a
problem may be too big or too "unreasonable" to
"conquer." The problems of the world
are going to need new thinking to solve. So, too,
will our own problems.
So, I am choosing to
view my lawsuit as a metaphor, as a
gift. It allows me to face my fears and to
recognize that my fighting back is more than about
me, it's about the work I do and the work we all
do to help educate about and provide treatment
options for shoplifting addiction. I won't get
into the finer details of the lawsuit here but I
am encouraged to have an attorney who believes my
case has merit and is confident I will prevail.
And, while I'm certain, the organization suing me
feels equally righteous in their position that I
am, in essence, "stealing" from them, I continue
to choose to see the world as a big place
where there is enough room for many different
voices and contributors. Nobody has a monopoly on
the term "shoplifters anonymous"; or, at least in
my mind, nobody should.
Indeed, this
lawsuit is a reminder to me, as well, to
be flexible and gracious as others will certainly
build upon and add to what I have pioneered. This
is as it should be. To this end, I am also very
open and receptive to any support--emotional,
legal, financial, or spiritual--which you or
others may offer. Feel free to contact me by
phone, letter, or e-mail. Thanking you in
advance. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2008...
Looking back:
2008 was another productive year!
We've continued to
see a growing interest and need for specialized
education and treatment for compulsive theft
and spending as the economy has sputtered and
many people are bottoming out in debt and credit
at the same time shoplifting and stealing have
dramatically increased.
Mr. Shulman
published his third book in April: "Bought Out and
$pent! Recovery from Compulsive $hopping and
$pending" which has met with positive response and
reviews.
Mr. Shulman also organized and
presented at The 2nd International Conference
on Compulsive Theft and Spending in Detroit in
September. While the turnout was a bit lower than
had hoped, we had 15 attendees from across the
U.S. and Canada and the quality of presentation
and discussion was vibrant and
diverse.
C.A.S.A.-Detroit celebrated its
16th Anniversary in September and C.A.S.A.-online
celebrated its 8th
Anniversary. Mr. Shulman also
started a 4th metro-Detroit area chapter in
February. In 2008, some other national
chapters of C.A.S.A. have discontinued meeting
in Minneapolis, Sacramento, Redding, CA, and
Lincoln, NE. Meanwhile, other chapters have
launched in Carlisle, PA, Reseda, CA,
Syracuse, NY, and Spanish-speaking groups have
popped up in Culver City, CA as well as
online. Weekly phone meetings have taken root
as well. Groups continue in metro-Detroit,
Seattle, Atlanta, Virginia, and the Los Angeles
area. There may be new groups starting in 2009 in
west Michigan, Colorado, Massachusetts, and
Florida.
The Shulman Center continues to
offer options for help through several sources:
counseling in person and by phone (individual,
couples, family, and group), local and online
support groups, books, websites, classes,
presentations, and
trainings. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Some other
highlights from
2008:
January:
Mr. Shulman was featured on re-runs
on The Mike and Juliet Show (shoplifting) and
Women's Entertainment TV's "Secret Lives of Women"
(shoplifting). He also appeared live on The Mike
and Juliet Show for a new segment on
shoplifting.
June:
Mr. Shulman was featured in an article in
The Washington Post about compulsive shopping and
spending.
July:
Mr. Shulman was featured in an article in
The New York Daily News on compulsive shopping and
spending and in The Gainesville, Florida press for
an article on employee theft. Mr. Shulman also
appeared live on The Early Show to discuss
compulsive shopping and
spending.
August:
Mr. Shulman was interviewed on National
Public Radio's "News and Notes" program discussing
shoplifting and compulsive shopping and
spending.
September:
Mr. Shulman was interviewed on Detroit's
local "Street Beat" program about his
work.
October:
Mr. Shulman was profiled in The Detroit
Legal News and The University of Michigan Alumni
Magazine.
November:
Mr. Shulman was quoted in an article
about compulsive shopping and spending in U.S.
News and World Report and in an article on
shoplifting in The Chicago
Tribune.
December:
Mr. Shulman was interviewed in articles
on compulsive shopping and spending in The Wall
Street Journal and The Salt Lake City Weekly. He
also filmed on location in Boise, Idaho for a
documentary on compulsive shopping and spending to
air in early 2009 on Women's Entertainment
TV.
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Looking forward to
2009 and beyond:
Why we do what we
do...
This past month, a woman traveled
1,000 miles by plane from Rhode Island to work
with The Shulman Center program intensively
here in the Detroit area over the course of 3
days. She is now in recovery from compulsive
shoplifting and stealing and is looking at her
shopping and spending patterns, too. She attended
our local C.A.S.A. meeting and shared how
appreciative she was to have a safe space to heal
and grow. We always learn from our clients and
appreciate the opportunity to serve others. She
came ready to work and was committed to herself.
Obviously, her journey continues.
It's
hard, at times, to hear from so many people by
e-mail or phone who say they want help but won't
commit the time, energy, and money necessary to
receive that help. Often, we just don't trust
or don't feel worth investing in oursleves. Is
2009 the year you take your life to the next
level? -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2009
is shaping up to be another powerful year in the
field of compulsive theft and
spending:
Mr. Shulman will be featured on the
MSNBC series "Theft in America" in early
2009.
February 14, 2009: The major motion
picture "Confessions of a Shopaholic" is scheduled
for release. Mr. Shulman was interviewed by People
Magazine for an article that will be published in
February in relation to this
film.
Mr. Shulman will present on
compulsive shopping & spending at the National
Association of Social Workers--Michigan chapter
annual conference April 15-6, 2009 in Lansing,
MI.
Mr. Shulman will present on
compulsive shopping & spending at the April
22-24, 2009 Foundations in Recovery Process
Addictions conference in Las Vegas,
NV. _________________________________________________________________________________________
A shout out
to two of my good friends and colleagues, Dr.
April Benson who has just published her new book
"To Buy or Not to Buy: Why We Overshop and How to
Stop," and John Howard Prin who has just
published his new book "The Roadmap to
Lifelong Recovery." Both are wonderful reads and
are available through Amazon. Congratulations
April and John!
Terry _________________________________________________________________________________________
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!
WE APPRECIATE YOUR
SUPPORT! ________________________________________________________________________________________
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