THE SHULMAN CENTER e-NEWSLETTER TURNS 10 YEARS OLD! WE JUST REACHED 2,000 MONTHLY SUBSCRIBERS-THANK YOU! The Shulman Center on the move and in the news… October 1, 2014–Mr. Shulman has an article about retail theft and the holiday shopping season in the quarterly Jack Hayes Loss Prevention newsletter. See www.hayesinternational.com October 6-8, 2014–Mr. Shulman will present on compulsive shopping/spending at the 4th Lifestyle Intervention Conference in Las Vegas. See www.lifestyleintervention.org October 23, 2014–Mr. Shulman is sponsoring a 4-hour inservice on hoarding disorder presented by the Washtenaw County (Michigan) Hoarding Task Force though the AAA 1-B Area Agency on Aging in Southfield, MI. October 23, 2014–Mr. Shulman will be presenting “Cultivating Honesty and Integrity in our Kids (and ourselves) in an Increasingly Dishonest World” at The Franklin Public Library in Franklin, MI. Free. November 7-8, 2014–Mr. Shulman will present on DSM-5 changes at the Annual Michigan Association of School Social Workers in West Michigan. November 13, 2014–Mr. Shulman will present on the connection between gambling addiction and theft behaviors/addiction at the HMSA Lecture Series in downtown Detroit from 9:30am -12noon. Registration required. November 13, 2014–Mr. Shulman will be presenting on compulsive shopping and spending at The Community House in Birmingham, MI. December 1, 2014–Mr. Shulman will have his article published on managing addictions (with a focus on shopping addiction) in the quarterly In Recovery Magazine out of Prescott, AZ. See: www.inrecoverymagazine.com February 3, 2015–Mr. Shulman will present on compulsive hoarding at The Rochester Hills, Michigan Public Library. Free April 29, 2015–Mr. Shulman will present on hoarding disorder at the annual Michigan Conference on Mental Health and the Aging in Lansing, MI. Please Follow us on Twitter @terrenceshulman or @TheShulmanCenter and Facebook at The Shulman Center. NOTE: If you’re a therapist, please consider contacting us to enroll in our brief, affordable local or virtual training to become more proficient at assessing and treating compulsive stealing, spending & hoarding disorders.See Shulman Center Training THERE’S A FEELING I GET, WHEN I LOOK TO THE WEST MY RECENT TRIP and PRESENTATION IN L.A. My wife and I recently returned from a 5-day mid-September trip to Los Angeles to visit my younger brother Sam who’s been in the music biz for 8+ years out there (see: www.5amcollective.com). We also had our own business–I gave a 2 and 1/2 hour presentation on compulsive theft, spending and hoarding to over 200 mental health professionals at a guest speaker series hosted by The Thelma McMillen Center at Torrance Memorial Treatment Center in Torrance, CA (see: Frontiers in Addiction) The trip was a success on both a personal and professional level, despite the near-record 97-100 degree heat in the L.A. area. When I travel (with or without my wife), I’m always working on pacing myself so I don’t rush-rush and pack too much in. I’d give myself a “B” grade and it was good to see that my brother has made some progress in the same area of his life. We got to spend some time immersed in my brother’s world–the music biz–and attended a meeting with him and some higherups at a major record label who just signed a band he manages called The Moth and The Flame who hail from Utah. (see their website at www.themothandtheflamemusic.com) As my wife says: “those music people have a language all their own!”
We also got to visit with some friends who came down from Santa Barbara to meet us for lunch and to go to the Los Angeles County Art Museum to see a special art exhibit. I’m always amazed at how much culture is in L.A. and how the vibe and the people seem laid-back but on-the-go at the same time. Then we met with Jacquie Jordan, founder and director of TV Guestpert–a Media Development, Management and Production company–who I recently enlisted to help me with some of my marketing strategies to help me reach a wider audience through TV, radio, Internet and print interviews. We had a great hour-long talk over coffee. See: TV Guestpert We didn’t get to the ocean but we did go to a movie, walk around a lot, eat great food, meet some of my brother’s cool friends, and hit a free outdoor concert in Chinatown. I know how to fit in most places but I still felt very Mid-westerny! (read: middle-aged and middle-of-the-road!) I also had the opportunity to attend the Culver City, CA C.A.S.A. (Cleptomaniacs And Shoplifters Anonymous) group. An acquaintance of mine started the meeting about 7 years ago. She died suddenly about 2 years ago at age 50 but the group lives on and is thriving. This was my 4th time attending the group during my annual L.A. visits. There were about 15 members and I was quite moved by the honesty and vulnerability in the sharing. There’s something about them Californians! Oh, and we got a little rest somewhere along the way before my presentation in Torrance on the last day of the trip (we literally were on a plane back to Detroit two hours after my talk). As usual, I felt very excited and privileged to speak–especially among a large group of my peers. I felt welcomed and I felt the audience both enjoyed and learned a lot from my Power Point and videoclip presentation. I polled the audience at the start of my talk and it seemed about half were most interested in learning more about hoarding, slightly more than a quarter were most interested in shopping addiction, and the remainder were most looking forward to hearing about compulsive shoplifting and stealing. A number of therapists talked to me afterwards (and a few emailed me later) to inquire about my local and longdistance counselor training. It was a successful trip and little by little more and more people are learning about the prevalence of compulsive theft, spending and hoarding and how important it is to provide more treatment and resource options. What can (and will) you do to assist to help us spread the word and provide solutions?
A FEW TIPS TO KEEP HALLOWEEN WITHIN YOUR BUDGET
Halloween marks the start of the holiday shopping season and can be more trick than treat on a budget. Here’s a few creative ideas worth considering to make sure the ghouls don’t spoil your fun! 1. Check out your closets and make your own costumes. 2. Give out loose change, coupons, or odds ‘n ends for treats. 3. Bake cookies or other tidbits for treats. 4. If you haven’t already stored decorations from last year, use natural decorations like leaves, branches, pine cones, or make decorations with the kids using art supplies on hand. 5. Use make-up on hand rather than buying special make-up for costumes. 6. Have a community pot-luck rather than cooking yourself. 7. Find music or sound effects on the Internet to play for mood. 8. Donate left over costumes/decorations to a charity and get a tax deduction. 9. Pick apples from local apple trees, wash them & give as treats. 10. Ration the treats you give out and allow your kids to eat (may also save on dental bills!) 12-YEAR OLD SHOPAHOLIC & OTHER BIG SPENDING KIDS by April Benson, PhD Huffington Post 9/30/14 The following are a few excerpts from a very recent article on the increasing juvenile shopping addiction trend, written by my colleague and friend, Dr. April Benson of NYC, a pioneer in the shopping addiction field… Pre-teen Chase petulantly tosses a pink designer coat onto her bed, then says, “I wear this at school. Grandma bought it for me… cause I’m spoiled.” Twelve-year-old Romy has a collection of 50 designer purses, including a $3,000 Chanel bag. A gifted musician who won a scholarship to a prestigious music school, Romy justifies her outsized desires and their exorbitant cost. “I’m saving the money of the school fees so the money I save, I’m allowed to spend on what I want.” Glorifying over-the-top spending, 12-Year-Old Shopaholic and Other Big Spending Kids, a three-part British documentary that aired in June, profiles four kids, ages 9 to 15 and their wellmeaning, but confused and overindulgent parents whose own unresolved issues result in massive overspending and a financial fog so thick that even the one that blankets London can’t compete. As a psychologist who specializes in the study and treatment of shopping addiction, I found the documentary disturbing, selling, as it does, a bill of goods that proclaims, “whoever said money doesn’t buy happiness simply didn’t know where to shop.” Another young overshopper, 15-year-old Lauren, believes that new shoes chase away the blues. “I was like begging my mom for these,” she says as the camera focuses on an enormous pile of shoes. “They were really expensive and I haven’t even worn them once. I think when I throw stuff away, it’s because I hate the way I look in clothes. At first, I like it on me and then I think it makes me look not good, so then I don’t want it any more.” Who are these extremely indulgent parents who foot the bill? See rest of the article at: Child Shopaholics FINDING THE RIGHT THERAPIST by Elizabeth Bernstein The Wall Street Journal 9/23/14 People write me from time to time to ask, “How do I find a good therapist?” I went to Prudence Gourguechon, a Chicago psychiatrist and psychoanalyst and past-president of the American Psychoanalytic Association, to find out what people entering therapy should look for in a therapist, how to establish the relationship and what the best ways are to work together to maximize treatment. To find a therapist to try out, Dr. Gourguechon recommends asking friends if they know of someone they can recommend. If a friend has his or her own therapist, ask the friend to ask the therapist for a referral. Refrain from seeing the same therapist that a close friend or family member sees. If you can’t find a word-of-mouth recommendation, she suggests using a website such as Psychology Today; professionals post information about themselves on its “Find a Therapist” feature. When you see a promising listing, check out the therapist’s website. Does he or she write well and view things similarly to how you do? At the first meeting, Dr. Gourguechon says, pay attention to the fit. Are you comfortable with the office environment and the person’s style of relating? Do you get the sense the therapist has a good preliminary understanding of what you are going through? “You should feel that they are tuned in and on your wave length, and that you can expect the relationship and understanding to deepen,” Dr. Gourguechon says. See rest of article at: Finding The Right Therapist
HOW TO EXERT SELF CONTROL
by Pamela Druckerman NY Times 9/12/14 PARIS – NOT many Ivy League professors are associated with a type of candy. But Walter Mischel, a professor of psychology at Columbia, doesn’t mind being one of them. “I’m the marshmallow man,” he says, with a modest shrug. I’m with Mr. Mischel (pronounced me-SHELL) in his tiny home office in Paris, where he spends the summer with his girlfriend. We’re watching grainy video footage of preschoolers taking the “marshmallow test,” the legendary experiment on self-control that he invented nearly 50 years ago. In the video, a succession of 5-year-olds sit at a table with cookies on it (the kids could pick their own treats). If they resist eating anything for 15 minutes, they get two cookies; otherwise they just get one. I’ve given a version of the test to my own kids; many of my friends have given it to theirs. Who wouldn’t? Famously, preschoolers who waited longest for the marshmallow went on to have higher SAT scores than the ones who couldn’t wait. In later years they were thinner, earned more advanced degrees, used less cocaine, and coped better with stress. As these first marshmallow kids now enter their 50s, Mr. Mischel and colleagues are investigating whether the good delayers are richer, too. At age 84, Mr. Mischel is about to publish his first nonacademic book, “The Marshmallow Test: Mastering Self-Control.” He says we anxious parents timing our kids in front of treats are missing a key finding of willpower research: Whether you eat the marshmallow at age 5 isn’t your destiny. Self-control can be taught. Grown-ups can use it to tackle the burning issues of modern middle-class life: how to go to bed earlier, not check email obsessively, stop yelling at our children and spouses, and eat less bread. Poor kids need self-control skills if they’re going to catch up at school. Mr. Mischel – who is spry, bald and compact – faced his own childhood trials of willpower. He was born to well-off Jewish intellectuals in Vienna. But Germany annexed Austria when he was 8, and he “moved quickly from sitting in the front row in my schoolroom, to the back row, to standing in the back, to no more school.” He watched as his father, a businessman who spoke Esperanto and liked to read in cafes, was dragged from bed and forced to march outside in his pajamas. His family escaped to Brooklyn, but his parents never regained their former social status. They opened a struggling five-anddime, and as a teenager Walter got a hernia from carrying stacks of sleeves at a garment factory. One solace was visiting his grandmother, who hummed Yiddish songs and talked about sitzfleisch: the importance of continuing to work, regardless of the obstacles (today we call this “grit”). Mr. Mischel came both to embody sitzfleisch, and to study it. Over a 55-year academic career he has published an average of one journal article, chapter or scholarly book about every three
months. Over the years, some of the original subjects in the marshmallow study have begged to know whether they ate the marshmallow as preschoolers; they can’t remember. He has told only one of them, who had cancer at 40, and asked to know his marshmallow results on his deathbed. (He was a “pretty good” delayer, Mr. Mischel says diplomatically.) See rest of article at: Self-Control (and this month’s book review) VIRGINIA SHERIFF’S DEPUTY ARRESTED FOR SHOPLIFTING September 2014: A former Fairfax County sheriff’s deputy charged with shoplifting twice from a Target in Leesburg pleaded no contest Tuesday. Robert H. Palmer, who retired from the sheriff’s office at age 50, just before he was charged with petty larceny, was sentenced to 30 days in jail and a $1,000 fine. Both were suspended on the conditions that he remain on good behavior, stay away from all Target stores in Loudoun County and pay restitution of $100.40, according to commonwealth’s attorney’s office spokeswoman Heather Williamson. Palmer’s attorney, Alex Levay, said that the timing of Palmer’s retirement was linked to the shoplifting charges that were about to be brought against him. “I think that there was a connection between the two,” Levay said. Palmer’s shoplifting was reported to Leesburg police by Dallas Northington, 29, a Target security officer. Northington said that he regularly reported shoplifters to police in his nearly eight years working at the store. But when he reported Palmer, he said, he was told he had violated procedure by not seeking approval before calling police, and he was fired from his job. The Target where Northington worked, on Edwards Ferry Road, would not state whether Northington had been rehired, nor would the company’s human resources department discuss the matter. Levay said that he thought the news coverage of Northington’s firing had drawn extra attention to Palmer’s case. “Mr. Palmer has gotten a lot of scrutiny because of something that really had very little to do with him,” Levay said. “More attention than anyone would get in this type of case. And it’s been tough on him and his family.” FORMER NBA STAR CAUGHT SHOPLIFTING $14K FROM APPLE September 2014: (AP) – Former NBA guard Rex Chapman has been arrested for allegedly shoplifting $14,000 worth of merchandise from an Apple store in Scottsdale and then selling the items at a pawn shop. Police took the 46-year-old Chapman into custody Friday afternoon after officers stopped his vehicle in northeast Scottsdale, Arizona. They say he’s being held on suspicion of nine counts of organized retail theft and five counts of trafficking in stolen property. Police say Chapman made it appear he was using the store’s self-checkout, but left without paying. He allegedly stole from the store seven times and sold the items for cash. Chapman, a former Kentucky star, was a first-round draft pick of Charlotte in 1988. He also played for Washington, Miami and Phoenix in a 12-year NBA career that ended in 2000. SPOTLIGHTS: “In Recovery” Magazine There’s a wonderful relatively new quarterly recovery magazine I want to let you know about. It’s called “In Recovery.” Founded 2 years ago by Kim Welsh, a recovering person herself, in Prescott, Arizona–home to many treatment centers and half-way houses, this magazine has something for everyone. I visited Kim in October 2013 and was honored to be invited to write a regular column about process/behavioral addictions–starting Spring 2014. The magazine is available in hard copy as well as online at: www.inrecoverymagazine.com 3rd Millenium STOPLifting Online Education Course! 3rd Millenium Classrooms out of San Antonio, TX has been offering high-quality online education courses for alcohol, marijuana and shoplifting issues for many years now. I’ve been honored to help them fine-tune and update their shoplifting course which many are court-ordered to complete after an arrest. 3rd Millennium Classroom’s STOPLifting is an online intervention course designed to assist shoplifters in examining and altering their attitudes and behaviors towards shoplifting. The course incorporates evidential examples and related follow-up questions to discover the student’s motives behind shoplifting, reveal possible patterns in his or her behaviors, and identify potential triggers and ways to cope. Through STOPLifting’s unique motivational interviewing style, students are encouraged to evaluate the personal consequences of shoplifting and how they affect the individual, his or her family and those around him or her. See: www.3rdmiclassrooms.com Castlewood Eating Disorders Treatment Centers I was privileged to tour Castlewood Treatment Center near St. Louis in August 2014 while in town for a conference. Castlewood also has centers in Birmingham, Alabama and in Monterey, California. They have been around for over a decade and have a great reputation and great staff. See: www.castlewoodtc.com
Clutter-Hoarding National Clean-Up Services See: http://www.clutterhoardingcleanup.com/ Honesty is its own reward.–Anonymous Walk in peace. The Shulman Center 2014 Ongoing Events Calendar Ongoing … The Baton Rouge, Louisiana court system has a court-ordered, facilitated educational program for retail fraud offenders. The program is based on material from Mr. Shulman’s book Something for Nothing: Shoplifting Addiction and Recovery. Mr. Shulman created a 1-hour employee theft online course with360 Training. Learn why people steal from their jobs, how to deter it, prevent it, and what to do when confronted with it. Enroll at: http://theshulmancenter.360training.com Mr. Shulman created an online continuing education course on compulsive shopping and spending called Bought Out and $pent! based on his book and Power Point presentation. The course, CEs offered, through The American Psychotherapy Association. at: http://www.americanpsychotherapy.com “In Recovery” Magazine There’s a wonderful relatively new quarterly recovery magazine I want to let you know about. It’s called “In Recovery.” Founded 2 years ago by Kim Welsh, a recovering person herself, in Prescott, Arizona–home to many treatment centers and half-way houses, this magazine has something for everyone. I visited Kim in October 2013 and was honored to be invited to write a regular column about process/behavioral addictions–starting Spring 2014.The magazine is available in hard copy as well as online at: www.inrecoverymagazine.com 3rd Millenium STOPLifting Online Education Course! 3rd Millenium Classrooms out of San Antonio, TX has been offering high-quality online education courses for alcohol, marijuana and shoplifting issues for many years now. I’ve been honored to help them fine-tune and update their shoplifting course which many are court-ordered to complete after an arrest.3rd Millenium has partnered with Terrence Shulman and The Shulman Center on this course. See: www.3rdmilclassrooms.com
RESOURCES OF NOTE…
THE SHULMAN CENTER THERAPIST TRAINING PROGRAM!
If you’re a therapist and wish to be trained & certified in the assessment/treatment of compulsive theft, spending and/or hoarding, CONTACT THE SHULMAN CENTER NOW! See: http://www.theshulmancenter.com/counselor-training.html 3rd MILLENIUM STOPLifing ONLINE EDUCATION COURSE! 3rd Millenium Classrooms out of San Antonio, TX has been offering high-quality online education courses for alcohol, marijuana and shoplifting issues for many years now. I’ve been honored to help them fine-tune and update their shoplifting course which many are court-ordered to complete after an arrest. Please check out their courses on their website at: www.3rdmilclassrooms.com IN RECOVERY MAGAZINE–PRESCOTT, ARIZONA There’s a wonderful relatively new quarterly recovery magazine I want to let you know about. It’s called “In Recovery.” Founded 2 years ago by Kim Welsh, a recovering person herself, in Prescott, Arizona–home to many treatment centers and half-way houses, this magazine has something for everyone. I visited Kim in October 2013 and was honored to be invited to write a regular column about process/behavioral addictions–starting Spring 2014.The magazine is available in hard copy and online at: www.inrecoverymagazine.com GET A BOOST with MONEY LIFE-COACHING Tom Lietaert of Sacred Odyssey and the Intimacy with Money programs offers individual money coaching as well as various group workshops on money. Check out Tom’s two websites at: www.sacredodyssey.com / www.intimacywithmoney.com CONSULTING AND EDUCATION ON FRAUD Gary Zeune of Columbus, Ohio has been a friend and colleague of mine for nearly two years. He has been a consultant and teacher on fraud discovery and prevention for nearly 30 years. He is interviewed in my book Cluttered Lives, Empty Souls: Compulsive Theft, Spending & Hoarding. I recently saw Gary in action recently when he presented an all-day on fraud to metroDetroit accountants. See: www.theprosandthecons.com RECOVERING SHOPAHOLIC BLOG AND EDUCATION Debbie Roes is an educator and recovering shopaholic and offers a free insightful blog and e-Newsletter to help you. See: http://www.recoveringshopaholic.com THE FLY LADY ASSISTS WITH CLEANING & DECLUTTERING I recently was told about a website resource that lists strategies for cleaning and de-cluttering and sells various books and products that help with this; so, I’m passing it along… See: www.flylady.net CASTLEWOOD EATING DISORDERS TREATMENT CENTERS I was privileged to tour Castlewood Treatment Center near St. Louis in August 2014 while in town for a conference. Castlewood also has centers in Birmingham, Alabama and in Monterey, California. They have been around for over a decade and have a great reputation and great staff. See: www.castlewoodtc.com
Mr. Shulman’s books available for purchase now! Click here to shop amazon.com Something for Nothing: Shoplifting Addiction and Recovery (2003) See also: www.somethingfornothingbook.com Biting The Hand That Feeds: The Employee Theft Epidemic… New Perspectives, New Solutions (2005) See also: www.bitingthehandthatfeeds.com Bought Out and $pent! Recovery from Compulsive $hopping/$pending (2008) See also: www.boughtoutandspent.com Cluttered Lives, Empty Souls: Compulsive Stealing, Spending and Hoarding (2011) See also: www.clutteredlives.com Contact The Shulman Center: Terrence Daryl Shulman, JD, LMSW, ACSW, CAADC, CPC Founder/Director, The Shulman Center for Compulsive Theft, Spending & Hoarding P.O. Box 250008 Franklin, Michigan 48025 E-mail: terrenceshulman@theshulmancenter.com
Call (248) 358-8508 for a free consultation! Our Web Sites: The Shulman Center Shoplifting Addictions Kleptomaniacs Anonymous Something For Nothing Shopping Addictions Shopaholics Anonymous Bought Out and Spent Employee Theft Solutions Biting the Hand that Feeds Hoarding Therapy Hoarders Anonymous Terrence Shulman Books by Terrence Shulman: Something for Nothing:Shoplifting Addiction and Recovery Biting The Hand That Feeds:The Employee Theft Epidemic Bought Out and $pent! Recovery from Compulsive $hopping and $pending Cluttered Lives Empty Souls: Compulsive Stealing, Spending and Hoarding All book are available for $25.00 each (includes shipping and handling).
Click here to purchase.