Three Words: June, July, August:
Sweet Summer Surrender
by
Terrence Daryl Shulman
Summer’s upon us. How does it feel? For me, it’s a reminder to have fun and to relax. I’ve spent a long hard winter working on the outside and on the inside of my life. I spent spring planted seeds for new business, new endeavors, and for plans for the Summer. June, July, August. Three sweet words. What do you have planned?
One of my intentions for this year has been to find a balance between working hard and stopping to smell the roses. Sound familiar? I also have recently come up against my natural pattern of becoming exhausted, frustrated, and disappointed when things don’t go my way, like business or other projects. I’m continuing to look at “The Secret — the law of attraction” and how putting out too many expectations and working too hard can lead to burnout and a lack of results. It reminds me of the time eight summers ago when I felt frustrated that I didn’t seem to be able to attract a wonderful partner in my life. Finally, I surrendered and just set a more modest, short-term goal: just to have a fun summer. Two weeks later, I connected a woman at a lake party, we began dating, and she became my wife. So, I’m curious to see what’s in store if I let go and let his be my summer of surrender.
We talk a lot about surrender in recovery, don’t we? I’ll be the first to admit that my Type A personality is pretty ingrained. I get bored easily, I have lots of ideas for projects, and I like to pack my days to the brim. Sure, I become a couch potato every now and then, but it’s a real challenge for me to “go with the proverbial flow.” It’s scary. It feels risky. Will my business fade? Will the money run out? What about all my great ideas and projects? I’ve got “laziness” all enmeshed with “letting life come to me.” I’m a mover, a shaker, and I’ve already got a few projects lined up for the Fall that I need to do a little work on during the summer. But, I worry, if I don’t stop to smell the roses, something’s going to stop me in my tracks and make me slow down! Has that every happened to you?
In this hurry/hurry life we often lead, it’s no wonder many of us feel insane, neurotic, and addictive. In Europe, especially in France, they are known to take it pretty easy during the summer. Many of the French take off the entire month of August and relax, travel, whatever. Of course, some of the French have to be working in the travel, tourism and restaurant industry! I’ve also read that the European tradition of slowed down summers (as well as the 37 hour work week) may be falling by the wayside – largely, to keep up with all the other countries that have become workaholics.
So how do we slow down? Well, as a self-employed person, I do have the advantage of creating my own work schedule but I also have the burden of creating my own earnings and business. I have monthly income goals I like to meet but I’m also aware that I can be more mindful of my business expenses and personal expenses. If I spend less, perhaps I don’t need to make as much to live. So, while I have a few modest trips planned this summer, I’m looking at relatively creative and inexpensive ways to relax and have fun. Walks and hikes. Hanging out by pools or lakes. Throwing and attending parties. Reading. Writing. Playing my guitar. Watching DVD’s at night. Cooking and going out to restaurants. There’s gotta be a myriad of things to do – oh … and, just be.
My summer of surrender. I get excited and nervous just thinking about it. I’ll be checking in during the next few e-newsletters to let you know how it’s going. My 42nd birthday is June 27th. I have a Bar-B-Que planned with family and friends and am really looking forward to it. My summer of surrender is one of the gifts I am giving myself.